still me til they kill me

Power and Control video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLlXXt6WNsM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3exzMPT4nGI

would also recommend the Macho Paradox

http://www.respect.uk.net/data/files/booklet_for_male_victims__2010.pdf

I would recommend Evan Stark’s “Coercive control: how men entrap women in their personal lives” and Lundy Bancroft’s book: “Why does he do that” but Jackson Katz’s stuff is also fantastic.

Research done on male victims actually shows that male victims more readily report abuse than women and are more likely to state that it is the perpetrator’s fault than female victims who often blame themselves, the evidence also indicates that many male victims (though obviously not them all) are actually perpetrators mascarading as victims.

The Strathclyde Task Force to tackle domestic abuse (where the police pro actively target serial and serious domestic abuse offenders) have targetted 300 offenders, 298 are men! 99.4% have been men, 0.6% have been women – almost an anomoly.

Women’s abuse of men should not be acceptable but it should also not be seen as a mirror image of men’s violence against women because it is very different!

This article is not about whether it happens to men or not but about the brutal torture of Sam Stobbart who committed continued acts of serious harm towards her and their child and murdered her partner. Moat is a monster, to deflect his monstrous acts into “men are abused too, is horrendous and inhumane.

This was not necessary though. There is nobody here saying it doesn’t; you’re derailing a discussion about what constitutes the vast majority of abuse like this, which is man on woman violence between intimate partners. Your point was totally unnecessary.

The point is, of course some men are abused and it is awful and they deserve support. But that doesn’t change the fact that there is a control system called patriarchy that tells men that women are their property and that they are free to abuse them with little consequence. You wouldn’t go on a blog post about a man being abused and point out how a considerably higher percentage of women are abused and how this is encouraged through the way women are presented in the media and wank rags. So why are you on here, trying to discredit the article which points out the horrific abuse Sam Stobbart faced and how vilified she has been subsequently for the crimes of being both a woman and an abused woman. The article is about patriarchy and the glorification of abusive men (nb you’d never see glorification of an abusive woman) other than wanting to be like ‘feminists have the wrong idea about abuse’, which offends me. I appreciate your concern for ALL abused people but there’s nothing untrue or misleading in this article so why are you doing the typical patriarchy-denying thing of trying to lessen the impact of the brutality of abusive men and abusive-male supporting society?