Why is the Lockerbie bomber still alive? This week Senator Robert Menendez, Chair of the Congressional Inquiry into why someone (or indeed everyone) isn’t dead yet announced plans to send a team of yankee investigators to Scotland. This we can understand as it clear that protocol has been breached on this matter. When someone in Scotland commits a crime like say theft or in the case of the accused, Bertybasset al-Megrahi being spotted buying a jumper (or another one the same colour) which was found on a plane, they are tried by a group of vote hungry senators in the run up to mid-term elections. The only hope of clemency for those found guilty comes in the form of a Christmas pardon from our Lord and Saviour, Obama H. Christ.
Kenny McAskill chose to bypass the time honoured tradition of doing exactly what America wanted and instead exercised a strange form of indigenous justice. Under this crazed system us savage Scots occasionally demonstrate that we have different values to those who seek to destroy us…or America…or is that the same thing?
Anyways understandably pissed off Menendez is sending a crack team to Scotland to investigate what’s wrong with this crazy country and what we can learn from our American brethren. SSY meets the men who hope to save us.
Leading the group will be Frank “Freaky Sheik” McDeak (Dem.) Frank will investigate the disgraceful link between oil and political power in Scotland. “This all came as a shock for me, I had to cut short my Saudi holiday…I was watching 50 virgins spray oil out their whatnots while I threw dollars at them…and now I hear these Scotch have been cutting deals in exchange for oil…America would never cut deals with those who tried to blow us up in exchange for oil and money. The Sheik just wouldn’t have it.”
Perry: If you can't hang 'em - Shoot 'em!
Controversial Texas Governor Rick Perry (Rep.) is to investigate the woefully inhumane Scottish Justice system. “Sure I’ve killed a few people….well a few hundred…and I’ve fired all those in the justice system who questioned my decision to execute a man who according to all my closest advisors and scientists was asleep at the time he is supposed to have murdered his kids…but these Scotch! I tell you…letting someone go who allegedly bought a jumper, a strand of which was allegedly found on a plane that Iran Libya blew up…monsters I say…the lotta them!”
The final senator will be Hawky Pearson (Rep) well known international peace activist. He is concerned by what he sees as a continuation of a trend. “We should have seen the warning signs in Darien. For centuries Scots have been dragging their junior partners in the US around on a series of imperial adventures. They dragged us into their conflict with Libya then just like we sent our young men to die for Scottish oil companies in Iraq and Afghanistan. I say no more American blood should be spilled for Scottish interests!”
We also understand that the Senators are to be accompanied by other progressive Americans concerned that Scotland is slipping into an authoritarian nightmare.
Pat “McGroin” Robertson, gay rights activist, is looking into allegations that crazy, Christian homophobes are funded the very same SNP government who freed the terrorist plotter. “We believe some rightwing bus bandit may have influenced the Scottish regime with his insane ranting about the gays. I’ve never been to Scotland but as I’ve always said there are definitely lots of homos there. We can’t allow these people to influence the government.”
SSY preparing for the American Heroes
The group will be rounded off by asylum campaigner and renowned anti-racist Pat Buchanan. He is expected to directly challenge the racism of the Scottish regime by visiting the controversial “Border Wall” constructed all the way along the border to prevent the flow of poor southerners crossing the border to Scotland to access free personal care for the elderly and lower tuition fees. “I intend to deliver a message to the racists in Scotland. I will invoke the spirit of Reagan and say ‘Mr Hadrien! Tear down this wall!’”
In the US Mr al-Megrahi, convicted on, quite literally, a shred of evidence would have been taken out and shot thus saving the need for all these pesky investigations and all this pish chat about “the truth” “justice” and “closure.” The SSY is ecstatic that these Americans want to visit our depraved nation and show us the light.
We shall greet them on the tarmac waving our Saltires and asking…Why isn’t Scotland more like America?
Sam Stobbart, ex girlfriend of murderer Raoul Moat has shared her story about the abuse she suffered at his hands. In The News of The World’s interview with her, she talks about when he slapped her every other day, when he raped her, stamped on her stomach, punched her in the spine and gave her daughter a black eye by hurling a stool at her.
Sam’s report on the rape was: “He didn’t ASK me for sex, he just pushed me on to the sofa and pulled my clothes off, all my clothes.”
“Moat thought sex was his right.”
Sadly, this is the case with a million more relationships. Sam was a prisoner to Moat, she describes his power from body-building and steroid taking: “He could lift me up with one hand. I’m barely eight stone.”
Personally, I don’t think there is enough thoughts and attention paid to this horror that a woman had to live through. Sam got together with Moat when she was merely sixteen. Sam was essentially vulnerable and impressionable, of which Moat took full advantage. After the usual honey-moon period of bliss, Sam talks about how the slightest thing would set him off. She talks about how Moat beat over 30 men up in pubs because they looked at Sam. He would call her his “trophy girlfriend” and say that “no one should look at her”.
If you think this is a healthy relationship, you should seek help now, because you obviously have ’sick bastard syndrome’. The remedy for this is a rope around the neck or 50 painkillers and a bottle of vodka.
No amount of Photoshop>Blur>Overlay will make this man look like anything more than an ugly bastard.
On the other hand, you’re probably shocked and disgusted at this kind of treatment of a woman. Then it will shock you even more to visit R.I.P Raoul Moat on Facebook. Some of the newer comments, in light of Sam’s story are here for you to see.
Darren Dazaster Trapps: “…and as for Stobbard, saying she was raped.. how else was she gonna get a shag?? bloody smack rat.”
To this, someone replies:
Harry Harry Harri: “Stobbard makes wild claims that she was raped – wishful thinking on her part! She made no claim of this ever before, no allegations to police, no allegations to medical professionals or other law enforcement or statutory public body. These allegations of rape are not only fake but slander on a dead man’s name. Moat is not around to defend himself after being unlawfully killed by police. He was never questioned, cautioned, charged, arrested or convicted over any rape allegations. Stobbard changes her story to suit any chavvy murdoch newspaper. She is a liar and cheat – blood is on her hands not only for her boyfriend who was shot but also the policeman who was blinded. RIP MOAT”
Like… Where to start, you know? First of all, LEARN HER FUCKING NAME. It’s Stobbart, not Stobbard. Then, “wishful thinking” – Yes, because every woman wishes for rape. That’s exactly how it works you complete arsehole. Also, she never made the claim to the police because her roid-monkey tormentor would have battered her to death. And yes, she released her story now after he’s dead because he shot her for dumping him. What might have happened if she told the police he’d raped her. Put two and two together – if that’s possible for you. Then he’s off slagging Murdoch papers… jesus fuck. I’m soooo sure you read totally upper-class newspapers, with all your correct grammar and well-read vibes I get from you – NOT.
The comments on the article on line are even worse.
Marian writes: “Dear Miss Stobbart
Enough, there are real victims to this story.
PC Rathband – blinded
Your Ex, no the one after Raoul Moat, the one he shot remember? The one you replaced Raoul with.
His Family. His Children, Moat’s other children that you know of, and then you. You are the only one making money out of this, isn’t that a bit sad.”
Yes, being raped and battered isn’t worthy of being a victim. In fact, I’d say Sam Stobbart was probably grateful for the beatings and rape. She’s cheerily talking about it on video right there. Tears of happiness, eh? NOT.
Then ‘lisa babe’ writes: “Tall story.
I feel sorry for the next person who has the displeasure of dating her. I had to stop reading-I could not read any more of her nonsense. Not that I am in any way a Moat fan. Please don’t encourage more stories and pay her, I simply won’t be reading.
Condolences to Chris and family and thinking of the Police officer and his. God bless you’s.”
‘lisa babe’ I don’t think she’ll be ready to date anyone for a while, considerng that her boyfriend was just shot and killed by a psycho. No need to worry – OH WAIT it was nothing to do with you anyway!
I could go on, but to be frank, I can’t try to process any more of these horrible, evil two-cents worth pieces any more. There’s at least one comment I agree with:
John “I hope she gets aload of money even if it’s just to annoy some of you jelous lot on here. She was frightened of him and given the fact he shot her, dont you think she had ever reason to be scared? Now she just wants to give her side of the story so that people can see why she did what she did.
Also, you lot have no idea what is going on behind the scences so stop speculating about things you dont have a clue about. I cannot believe some of you are even suggesting that she doesn’t give a damn about her new boyfriends death or whats happened.”
Yes, John. I agree. I hope she does get compensation for living her live as a slave to a vicious murderer and beast. People saying she’s just cashing in are quite clearly jealous at the prospect of a woman getting money. So fuck? Money is money and people want it. Get over it. Sam is only a face in the sea of the faceless 1 in 4 women who suffer rape and the millions more who are slaves and punch bags in their own homes.
My closing message to these people is that the Internet is a forum for people to say whatever the fuck they like, but it’s not big or impressive. All you’re showing is that you’re condoning violence and sex crimes towards women. Learn to be a human being, and learn to fucking spell while you’re at it.
How women end up stuck in abusive relationships. Click to View.
And my closing message to those reading this is that we need to take violence and hate crimes against women in hand. This is not about equal pay and women getting the vote, this is about a war against women. The statistics show that a majority of women are in unhappy relationships due to oppression. Violent men compensate for their own shortcomings (Low self esteem, bad days, poverty, anger problems, inferiority complexes etc) by picking on those they see as being on a lower social rung – Women. They beat, rape and abuse the people who trust and love them, leaving mental and physical scarring. This is a torture device to vent the anger of men who can’t change or deal with not getting their own way.
This method of taking power has been around since forever. Men are instilled with the idea that if you can’t get what you want, you simply take it, or make someone else pay for your trouble. Those men are happy to have a punchbag and a sex doll to rape all their anger into, but what the public need to understand is that she’s screaming and crying out for help – those cries fall on the deaf ears of a patriarchal society, as shown by the reactions to Sam Stobbart’s horrific account.
Monday morning's headlines after SSY's legalise cannabis march
Every human society since we first evolved has experimented with drugs, pyschoactive substances, and altered states of consciousness.
Many leading psychologists and anthropologists believe that this is a normal part of human life, and experimenting with substances like cannabis or magic mushrooms has actually played a role in the evolution of modern, intelligent humans.
But in the last 200 years human society has changed dramatically. With the arrival of capitalism came the rise of modern states, with their borders, armies and police forces. As the technology to control their own people developed, states have had an ever increasing urge to monitor and discipline their populations.
One of the ways they have done this is implement a worldwide system of prohibition of drugs. While the two biggest drug killers, alcohol and tobacco, remain legal billion pound industries, relatively harmless drugs like cannabis and ecstasy remain the target of expensive police operations, and users are turned into criminals who can face imprisonment for doing nothing but experimenting with their own bodies.
The drugs laws we have in Britain and throughout the developed world have never borne any relation to real medical or scientific information, but instead have been shaped by the prejudices and scapegoats created by elites to divide and control the people. One of the main ways they have done this is to use racism, associating certain substances with foreigners or ethnic minorities.
Now, in the 21st century, many countries around the world are finally beginning to wake up to the fact that prohibition has been a costly disaster that has caused untold misery across the planet. The time has at last come to begin treating drugs as a health and social issue, not a criminal one, and base our drugs policies on real scientific evidence, not prejudice and racism.
If you want to free the weed clap your hands.. CLAP CLAP.
Yesterday saw the SSY organised Legalise Cannabis – End the War on Drugs demo take to the streets of the west end of Glasgow, with between 300-350 mostly young people turning out for the biggest march of its kind Scotland has seen for a number of years.
The demo left University Avenue in the west end of the city at around 1pm with a small police escort, before marching via Byres Road and Dumbarton Road to Kelvingrove Park. Indeed, the marchers then proceeded to er, legalise cannabis, with the police adopting a very welcome non-interference approach to anyone lighting up in the park!
Across the world, the tide is beginning to turn against blanket drugs prohibition. An ever increasing number of countries are opting to decriminalise possession and start treating drugs as a social and health issue, rather than a criminal one, with harm reduction at the fore. This couldn’t be further from the truth in the UK, however. None of the big four parties are willing to go anywhere near a policy of relaxing our backwards drugs laws – displayed all too recently in the rush to ban mephedrone, or m-cat, flying against the advice of top scientists and even the government’s own drugs advisory board, several of whom resigned in protest, but happily going along with the agenda of right-wing tabloids.
This is why we felt it especially important to take the message to the streets again this summer that there is a real alternative to the madness of drugs prohibition – to legalise, regulate and control drug use, rather than pushing the whole industry underground and into the arms global crime syndicates.
Saturday’s demo got a great reception from passers-by – afternoon shoppers on Byres Road applauded the march as it passed, while groups of young people charged over the street to join it as it went by. The fact is, most people know that cannabis is not a dangerous drug, and if the reception SSY have got on the streets over the past few weeks is anything to by, most people know it should legalised too.
For as long as the UK government continues on their ridiculous and, ultimately, flawed approach of criminalising young people who smoke the occasional joint, forcing heroin addicts into a life of crime and prostitution, and wasting vast amounts of police time and resources on a pointless “war on drugs” that fuels conflict across the world, SSY will continue to campaign for sweeping reform to the drugs laws. See youse all next year.
M-CAT NOT FAT CATS! The march sets off from Uni Avenue
When I say LEGALISE, you say.. CANNABIS!
The PA system that totally worked the whole time and that there was absolutely no problems with. Uhuh
Carmen Marie Moulton from Penrith died in April just after the government imposed a ban on mephedrone, due to media scare stories with no scientific basis. These stories, as we all now know, revolved around picking up on the death of virtually any young person around the country and pinning the blame on mephedrone. Many of these false stories have now been exposed as bollocks, but long after the fact.
Papers said police were probing whether Carmen had taken the “deadly party drug”, but yet again toxicology reports have pronounced her’s a non-mephedrone related death. While there’s little news as of yet as to what did cause her tragic death, expect to see more and more of these so-called M-Cat casualties turning out to actually have died of other drugs or natural causes.
As the Daily Mail picks up another story of mephedrone madness – this time the death of a daughter of a premiership footballer. Her tragic death is being used opportunistically by the tabloids to support their unscientific banning of mephedrone. In reality Sibylle Siberski tragically committed suicide, and the drugs she took are being used as a stick to attack them with. The fact that she killed herself after breaking up with a five month long relationship with her boyfriend is ignored – as is the fact she was taking another harmful drug, which acts as a depressant – champagne.
This dangerous champagne drug is associated with some of the worst criminals in the world – Saddam Hussein, Robert Mugabe, George Bush, Tony Blair, Maggie Thatcher and Tim Westwood are all known to have taken champagne at various times in their life. The effects of this drug have been disastrous – many former Eton pupils are known to have taken champagne regularly throughout their schooldays and then moved on to erratic and destructive behaviour resulting in millions of British people being made unemployed, in the coal and steel industries.
Alan Duncan gets high before launcing a vicious attack on the poor.
Champagne also inspired hostile, aggressive and unreasonable behaviour towards the people of Scotland, as many regular champagne users in the Tory cabinet continually denied the right for Scotland to have it’s own Parliament. This violent behaviour reached it’s worst when the Tories champagne induced madness led them to inflict the poll tax in Scotland. Regular champagne junkie Maggie Thatcher was so poisoned by the drug that she had to be dragged kicking and screaming from power by her own party members, desperate to put the clean living moderate John Major in her place.
SSY thinks if the tabloids are going to blame mephedrone baselessly for the tragic suicide of a young girl then we should take action against champagne, whose drug fuelled madness has allowed Tories to cause massive harm to some of the poorest communities in the UK.
More evidence, as if it was needed, that Nick Clegg is a giant walking sack of shit with a ministerial car: yesterday at Prime Minister’s questions he said the government was going to close Yarl’s Wood, a hellhole private prison for asylum seekers who have done nothing wrong.
But, a bit like when the Lib Dems promised in government that they would stop locking up kids, only to lock up and then deport a baby from Glasgow, it turns out this claim was about as true as the SDL claiming they’re not racist. The government’s real powers were quick to make sure everyone realised that in fact only the “family unit” (i.e. the bit where they lock up parents and their innocent kids) will be closed, but the centre as a whole will remain open. (Even on this minimal commitment – please note it hasn’t actually happened yet!)
Yarl’s Wood is a place where our society locks up people who have fled torture, rape and other horrors from around the world. Very often, their suffering in other places is the result of our government’s policies. When they get here, they are denied the right to live in relative safety in the UK, stuck in a private prison run for profit by 21st century evil megacorp SERCO, and eventually deported back to countries where they face extreme danger.
Earlier this year, innocent women locked up in Yarl’s Wood went on hunger strike to protest their incarceration, and the abusive, racist treatment they faced from SERCO’s staff.
Anyone with even an ounce of humanity or decency in their body who got into power would tear the prison walls down right away. Nick Clegg and his ConDem chums have proven that they’d like people to think they’re decent human beings, but in fact they’re duplicitous wankstains more interested in implementing an extreme-right economic programme than basic human rights.
Britain's shame: Yarl's Wood
You’d think this blatant porkie would have got Clegg in a spot of bother, but instead of being angry at him for lying from the dispatch box, all the media and political commentators are going mental about a point earlier on in the day when he actually told the truth!
In the posh boys debating style that Westminster is famous for, he was clashing with Jack Straw, and said, perhaps without thinking it through, that, “We may have to wait for his memoirs, but perhaps one day he will account for his role in the most disastrous decision of all: the illegal invasion of Iraq.”
This presents his Tory chums with a bit of a problem: they voted for the Iraq war back in 2003, and absolutely backed the idea that it was legal.
For once however, Clegg was telling the truth on this one. Under international law, the UK and US had no authorisation to send their troops into Iraq, and the rest of the world had to sit back and accept it because they didn’t know what else to do about George W. ‘Monkey with a razorblade’ Bush. In Britain, the then Labour government tried to pretend it was legal because they got the attorney general to “change his mind” and say everything was kosher in time for the invasion.
Now, the fact that the Deputy Prime Minister has said what we all know, that the war was illegal, from the government dispatch box, might give some more leverage to people who want to take the UK to court for war crimes and flouting of international law in invading Iraq.
Nothing to worry about lads, it's all legal and above board
To try and clean up the mess, the same beleagured government spokespeople were forced to insist that the deputy PM was speaking in a personal capacity (at Prime Minister’s questions! It doesn’t get much more official than that!), and that his views were not those of the government.
Nick Clegg is obviously a bit of an idiot if he thought that this would have no implications when he said it. But the sad thing is it’s obscured what is a big issue: privatised prisons which we use to lock up innocent people. The fact of the matter is, I don’t really care about the legality of the Iraq war. If the government at the time had managed to get a legal fig leaf for what they were doing it would still have been wrong, and no amount of debating after the fact will change that. What is happening right now though is that we have a piece of human garbage as deputy PM who keeps claiming he’s going to stop locking up kids and innocent people but never actually seems to make good on it.
Johnny Rotten is an arsehole. He betrayed his punk roots long ago and is now nothing more than a sad old man flogging things and selling his soul for kudos from capitalism. He recently said:
I showed what I can do with butter, right? Eighty-five percent increase in sales. I’m very proud of them Country Life ads. They were funny and clever and classy like the Toblerone ads I grew up with. But no one’s come in for me with anything else. Like … Red Stripe lager! I drink lakes of this stuff. Why haven’t I been signed up for something like that? Or Marlboro fags? It amazes me that people don’t get the opportunity of me. I sell.
But he’s also revealed that he’s not just a capitalist fuckpig, he’s thick as a plank and racist at that.
Rotten was asked by Palestinian campaigngroups not to perform in Israel, as part of a cultural boycott – the campaigners say cultural collaboration boosts Israel’s image on the international stage, and that refusing to participate in cultural exchange, artists and cultural institutions globally can send a clear message to Israel that their occupation and discrimination against Palestinians is unacceptable.
Surely such a politicised and aware person as Johnny Rotten would, even if he disagreed with the boycott, respond to the requests on a political level?
Nah. He has “absolutely one rule, right? Until I see an Arab country, a Muslim country, with a democracy, I won’t understand how anyone can have a problem with how they’re treated.”
Woah woah woah woah woah…! So, Johnny is acknowledging that the Palestinian people are treated like shit, and he just doesn’t care? And since when did ordinary Palestinians become responsible for the actions of everyone in the world who shares their religion? This is like saying that everyone of German descent deserves to be put into concentration camps just because of the actions of the Third Reich.
And, when he says that Muslims aren’t capable of democracy, he’s implying that Israel is a democracy, yeah? Despite removing Arab members of parliament for being too representative of the views of their constituents?
What a dick.
When faced with people slightly more reasonable than Rotten, the Palestinian campaigners’ requests to musicians have had some degree of success in the past, with artists such as Gil Scott-Heron, the Pixies, Massive Attack and Elvis Costello pulling out of scheduled gigs in Israel in order to show their support for the Palestinian struggle.
Interestingly, if internet hilarity merchants hadn’t hijacked Justin Beiber and voted for him to send his world tour to North Korea, Israel would have won the wee boy singer for their own. Is Israel suffering an epidemic of Bieber Fever? Or was Israel’s campaign orchestrated by zionists in the same way North Korea’s was orchestrated by online pranksters? One thing’s clear – the cultural boycott is definitely shaking things up and getting people to take notice of Israel’s appalling human rights record.
“OH GOD OH GOD STOP I CAN SEE SATAN HE’S LOOKING RIGHT AT ME!” -- this is not a common response to listening to most music, with the exception of Green Day or Daniel O’Donnell. However the world’s finest newspaper has found another TERRIFYING threat to your children -- noiseodrugs. Just when you thought your weans were safe from mephedrone -- or “meow meow” as no-one under 40 calls it -- sick bastards have concocted a new method to terrify your kids, and this time all they need is a pair of headphones and (surprise surprise) the internet to overdose.
The “drug” is called idoser and works by playing a series of binaural beats which affect certain parts of the brain to simulate being high. Some users claim to experience a high similar to being on cannabis or ecstasy, depending on what they listen to. Other tunes -- called “Idoses” -- are designed to be more extreme, almost like a bad trip and are called scary names like “Gates of Hades”. One user allegedly clawed his own eyes out with his fingers so he could jam a pencil into his brains whilst listening to “Gates of Hades” -- it later was revealed he was in fact listening to S-Club 7 “Ain’t no party like an S-Club Party”, which is still legal and unregulated.
It remains to be seen if the Government will try and ban idoses. Right now it seems very unlikely -- no one has died or been seriously harmed from idoses, and the nature of the internet makes it almost impossible to ban someone from listening to a piece of music. There’s also understandable disbelief about someone being able to get high off of listening to something (though amazingly binaural beats can affect brain waves).
Listening to this man is 23% more dangerous than crack.
I wouldn’t underestimate the power of media hysteria combined with Government opportunism though -- the fact people won’t understand how you can get high off of sounds may disturb and scare them more than getting high off of something you can understand like pills or grass. And under the ridiculous and draconian Criminal Justice Act “repetitive beats” which may be associated with drug use are technically illegal -- someone tell the Orange Order ASAP. Thankfully the tuneful symphony of most Irish rebel songs keeps them clearly on the side of British law.
With mephedrone banned after a wave of hysteria and media exaggeration in the face of scientific evidence, it’s not impossible idoses could be banned if newspapers decide to run with it. All it would take is a couple of savvy editors picking up stories of folk dying within a couple of hours/same evening as listening to an idose to start a frenzy, regardless of how they actually died - the same way they did with mephedrone. The reality is stuff like idoses -- like all things humans do to get high -- has been around for hundreds of years, it’s just been called something different. Instead of listening through headphones to get high tribes used to listen to repetitive drumming beats. Fortunately it took British imperialism a few hundred years before they banned that kind of thing in the Criminal Justice Act.
SSY has already risked life and limb to bring you a few examples of terrifying idoses which we have outlined below. Listen at your own peril,
Behavioural psychology tells us that in the morning you’ll be 17.8% safer after listening to this Idose
Call the polis, I can hear repetitive beats
OH GOD IT’S CALLED GATES OF HADES BAN THIS SICK FILTH NOW
Johnny Rotten
Woah woah woah woah woah…! So, Johnny is acknowledging that the Palestinian people are treated like shit, and he just doesn’t care? And since when did ordinary Palestinians become responsible for the actions of everyone in the world who shares their religion? This is like saying that everyone of German descent deserves to be put into concentration camps just because of the actions of the Third Reich.
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